First, what defines a toxic man ? First and foremost is narcissism. “They think no end of themselves and have a superiority complex.” Second, ”they are extremely cold and manipulative and frequently exploit other’s for their own gain.” Third, they present psychopathic behaviors, like being anti-social and impulsive; impaired empathy and remorse; extremely egotistical; exaggerate their sexual excellence; rebellious; dislike commitment and emotionally unavailable. Yet, in spite all of this, extremely charming.-bingedaily.in.
Women with low self esteem, frequently “fall prey to the charm of toxic men.”-bingedaily.in. So, if a toxic man is rude, mean, disrespectful, inconsiderate, it doesn’t make you feel much worse than you already feel.-bustle.com.2/9/17.
Then, women “fall into the “I can fix him” trap, which draws them deeper into the relationship. This is called ”rescuer syndrome.” Nothing engages the heart more than a person who is toxic and could use some help. The woman becomes determined to change or fix him. Although it seems quite romantic, and if the woman loves him enough, then love is expected in return. But, such is not the case. This kind of relationship is addictive…”a woman is willing to sacrifice an entire lifetime for 5 minutes of happiness…Toxic men reward women for ”good behavior” with the affection a woman craves, filling her brain with dopamine, the feel good hormone. She becomes addicted to the rush of dooamine (similar to a drug addiction) and crashes when he returns to toxic behavior.”-eviemagazine.com. 2/22/20.
Empaths, or women who are ”fixers”, are more susceptible to attracting toxic men…”without even trying, your sweet and understanding self is reeling them in”….thus leading from one toxic situation, to another.-bustle.com.2/9/17.
A woman exposed to a lot of toxicity growing up, is unconsciously attracted to that same kind of energy in their adult life.
If the woman views the toxic male as a ”good catch,” it makes the pursuit of the toxic male very exciting. If the woman does ”catch” him, the woman feels like it’s proof that she made it; caught the uncatchable. It’s definitely a self esteem boost, even if it’s not actual love, and not long lasting.-bustle.com.2/9/17.
Certified love coach James Green states: ”I can almost promise you that in every one of these scenarios, there was a past breakup that made the woman feel like they don’t deserve someone as good as they are.”-bustle.com. 2/9/17.
Conclusion: The best way to break the habit of toxic relationships, is to develop a healthy relationship with yourself. It’s important to know your own dignity and self worth; to get to know yourself; to set boundaries; to take the time to care for yourself…If you love yourself and are confident, you are more likely to attract good men…Even in a healthy relationship, we can become so used to the safety and security of a gentle partner, that you can find him less exciting over time, and that’s normal.-eviemagazine.com. 2/22/20. / Done